Strangers seem nicer when you have a dog and other observations from my walking hiatus

This summer my poor dog sprained her ankle (ouch!)  and after $800+ in vet bills to ensure she didn’t have joint disease and four weeks of swimming exercise only –we’re finally back on track with daily walks. Here are some things I noticed during my walking hiatus:

1) I walk a heck of a lot faster and with more purpose without my dog, but I have less occasion to walk very far.

2) I think my relationship with my husband is better when we walk in the mornings, perhaps conversation flows more freely with fresh air. I missed making plans for the day and week while trading who picked up the Newfie land mines.

3) Walking to get an Americano from Zoka with my dog and husband feels earned, while driving to Starbucks on the way to work for one, is well, excessive.

4) My neighborhood feels more like a welcoming community with friendly strangers when I have my 125 lbs. Newfoundland in tow. Here are my most common scenarios:

• There is the obligatory dog meet/greet as other seemingly friendly dogs and owners approach, and in some cases (more appropriate for weekend walks) you carry on full dog-themed conversations to establish age, gender, personality traits of each owner’s dog.
• My personal favorite would be when parents carrying or pushing a stroller  with a toddler point out my large dog and the child points and stares mouth agape in shock, “look at the big DOG.”
• Random smiles from people on the street, with comments like, “What a beautiful dog,” and “Is that a bear?”

Now that daily walks are back on, I realize how nice it is that my dog  can warm the mood of a passerby from stranger status to amiable neighbor, bring dinner plans and sharing top of mind for me and my husband, and even justify morning my coffee purchases.

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I guess I’m of a certain age where this is just going to happen–but does that mean I have to put up with it?

Have you noticed that it is apparently no longer taboo to ask coworkers when they are planning to get pregnant?

At least six times in the past two months, a random assortment of peers and the like have asked when I plan to have a baby.  At least two of those times, I walked into a meeting with the comment “I have good news” and before I can go on to share some process improvement or communications metric, someone blurts out, “Oooh, are you pregnant?” To which I quip “no” with a somewhat shocked glance back in their direction. Awkward silence. Chuckle. Start meeting agenda.

Now I can interpret this recent pattern of events in three initial ways*: 

1. I’ve suddenly started to look pregnant.
2.  I’m too excited when delivering professional updates and business results.
3.  Women of the 30-ish, married persuasion are expected to not only know when they want children but feel compelled to broadly share these private details with colleagues.

*The fourth and only forgivable reason to ask this is if the questioner themselves has recently returned from or is about to go on a maternity or paternity leave for having a baby. In this case pregnancy is  top-of-mind for them and only to be expected as a topic of casual conversation.

None of the three aforementioned causes for this recent phenomenon are particularly comforting to me. Either  my News Year’s diet is not working, I’m way too overly interested in my job, or I’m missing a key desire to broadcast my fertility status in public.

 I honestly don’t mind answering the question, but I’m just surprised this has entered the realm of generic office chit-chat. I thought this was reserved for one-on-one conversations with friendly coworkers or happy-hour, two-drink deep conversations (hopefully, the person suspected of pregnancy would not actually be drinking at the time of the conversation).

While you can easily do a web search to find office etiquette tips replete with guidelines for all sorts of routine interactions (which I find mildly comical in their own right), I see no mention of navigating the appropriateness of asking family planning questions at work.

In the meantime, I guess I better eat some more salad, tone down the corporate Kool-Aid rhetoric at the start of meetings, and plan a personal family planning elevator speech. At this rate, who knows what my peers will ask me next week.

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January gloom fogs my mood

I’m not sure if it is the steady diet of reading and watching journalists exploit the current economic crisis or just the normal gray skies, rare sun exposure, and rain of winter in the Pacific Northwest, but this has been one depressing January thus far.

 It is always a little sad to say good bye to the cheer and indulgence that surround holiday celebrations. But this somber mood is disappointing on so many levels, because like many voters seeking CHANGE, January 2009 was supposed to be the happiest moment of the decade. Last year for months, I day-dreamed and night-dreamed about a new direction for this country, filled with optimism for a fresh start. But, regardless of the new oath of office about to transpire–I cannot shake this cosmic doubt that change is not yet ripe for the taking. I wonder, do we have enough to influence the world to meet change half-way. Some part of me fears it may just linger our of our grasp for the next several years.

Headlines about the struggles in Iraq, Mumbai attacks, war in Gaza, layoffs, and recession fill papers and the 24-hour news cycle. Contrast these with the silliness of headlines about the Golden Globes and  newest film about to hit the theaters and you have a surreal mix of mental stimuli. I cannot open my hotmail inbox without seeing dozens of huge blowout sales and clearance e-mail marketing offers from assorted retailers-another reminder of the economic meltdown.

So I follow a wise quote:

“Today, give a stranger one of your smiles.  It might be the only sunshine he sees all day. ”    ~Quoted in P.S. I Love You, compiled by H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Then we  can only hope that February shines with a bright spot of optimism that is just temporarily hidden under the layers of gloomy fog.

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Remodel project catharsis

I’m three months deep into a remodel project on my house. I’m about to enter the almost done stage, but I don’t trust it. I won’t get my hopes up, not yet at least. 

You always hear stories of how people begin a project, expecting to spend a few weekends and weeknights to get it done–then six months and one special contractor later they actually complete the job. But, if you are overly arrogant like me, then you ignore the advice of wiser friends and begin your 600 square foot remodel with stupefying over optimism.

Ripping up baseboards, tearing our carpet, patching holes, spreading thin set mortar, laying tiles, cutting tiles to fit, repainting, grouting…sure sounds like a lot of work. But, because of my delusional eagerness after visiting Home Depot, reading DIY websites, and watching HGTV flip this house shows–I imagined the project going so much faster. Enter reality from stage left.

People who produce DIY shows and content should really feel bad about themselves. The 30-day project reduced to a 30-minute montage clip-show with sassy hosts wearing cute clothes sets unreal expectations for what you can really, truly, and actually do-yourself. A few hours too-many watching these faux-reality DIY shows gave me confidence that shrunk daily at each point where I had to lever tac-strips out of concrete with crow bars, or sit on my hands and knees and violently scrape vinyl-on-vinyl-on-vinyl 45-year old flooring up to make way for the new tile.

Not only can you not wear cute clothes while working on home-remodeling projects, but you also are tired, cranky, and have no social or entertainment life anymore.

I should point out that I’m not completely disappointed in the fruits of my labor-the cost-savings from DIY alone might be enough to justify the extra months the project has lagged on. Here is what I won’t miss when I’m finally done:

• Seemingly simple trips to Home Depot that result in $200-$300 cost
• Smell of dust and debris in my house
• Constant sweeping and vacuuming of aforementioned dust/debris
• Perfectly good PJ pants-turned-work-pants ruined with paint and tiling gunk
• Sore arm, neck, and knees

I’ll have to repost later with what I like about my remodel project-because right now, I’m a little sick of thinking about it….

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https://overtalk.wordpress.com/

My blog is hosted here: https://overtalk.wordpress.com/

 

I cannot figure out how to have this blog RSS subscribe to that one….

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Affordable gifts for this holiday season

There is very little that thrills me more in life than deciding on the perfect gift for a friend, colleague, or family member. Perhaps it is because gift-giving has always been such a well planned, deeply thoughtful process for my mother. Or, because I love the idea that small presents given to aknowledge a relationship can mean as much  as or even more than costly exhibits of generosity.

So here are some of my favorite things to give this season, under $30.

http://thymes.com/ – Frasier fir candles (a perfect hostess present that brings a little fresh forest warmth inside, plus they have absolutely adorable packaging).

http://www.netflix.com – What’s better than entertainment delivered to your house (honestly, I cannot remember what my life was like pre-Nexflix).

https://secure.nrdconline.org/08/costarica_inhonor/ntd2W2JYqLSQs?source=tgl_crrf – Plant a rainforest tree in someone’s name for $10 each, the perfect green gift.

There’s certainly more–but I cannot give away all my gift ideas until I know what I’m buying my family and friends.  Happy shopping friends.

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Get a huff of this: my online obsession of 2008

It has been nearly 11 months since I first discovered Huffington Post.

I first found the site because it was the top result on Live Search when I sought breaking news confirmation of Ted Kennedy’s endorsement of Barack Obama last winter. It was the political examination aplenty and scathing coverage of the media’s unyielding infatuation with last winter’s primary season that originally drew me in. But it was the left-leaning editorial selections and clever headlines which kept me coming back for more.

First my site visits were a sporadic few days a week, then they turned more reliant with visits every day, and now this site is a centerpiece to my online ritual with multiple daily check-ins. I’ve never been a frequent You Tube visitor or SNL-watcher to monitor the latest shenanigans of pop culture–no matter, the fine staff of Huffington Post keeps me informed of the trivial as well as changes in major U.S. news, politics, entertainment, and media. The focus on publishing bloggers too brings a nice variety of homogenous liberal critiques that also stroke my desire to if not be informed, at least feel informed.

I’m not sure if Huff Post has made me any smarter, but I must admit they’ve kept me thoroughly entertained thus far and I won’t be turning away any time soon. Here’s to one more loyal site visitor in 2009!

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Explain the name

Here’s what I was going for with my blog title choice.

1.     I like admitting a personal flaw right from the start.  This play on over talking emphasizes my predisposition to both talking too much and talking with little regard for whether others are already doing so or even listening once I begin.
2.      I love the simple purity of the definition of talking over (to weigh in conversation; consider; discuss; OR to cause (someone) to change an opinion; convince by talking).

That’s enough for an introduction.

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